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Sunday, July 06, 2008/ 10:28 PM philosophy of life what does my life resolves around? i dunno. and maybe its time to find out. its a joy to have lived. healthily. i felt that my burden has been heavier. not physical. but mental. my life does not belongs to me alone. i used to answer a certain question confidently. maybe not now. or rather i will avoid that particular question. life is certainly not about just pure mugging. being smart. earning big bucks. getting married. living in a big house. that shouldn't be the mindset that one should have. that's maybe becos one has not experienced enough. the true meaning of life and death. upon what should i really do. maybe taking things casually would be good to start out with. no. my life is definitely not just bout studies. i currently carry yet another unaccomplished dream nw. as such, i cannot be so selfish. if i din make the cut in my studies, so be it. its just a matter of how people sees me. theres is not a need to do things that seemed so forced to shut ppls mouth off. though there exists only 1 heart, its seemingly carrying 2 different aspirations, dreams, heart's desires. enough of that, i finally find time to go to the hospital. and its the 2nd time in such a short space of time that i encountered the word 'death'. i believed nobody there would want to be lying in that bed of theirs. maybe they would be thinking, "if i were to be given a chance to live with a healthy body, i would..." maybe its just another tendency that ppls will start to cherish, when 'death' is nearing. my uncle's leg is machine-like. really in a bad condition. went for operations for at least 2 times le. since when did we start to treat our legs nicely? work was fun. it has been a long time since i have missing items. the best part has to be wearing a mcd uniform, and going into KFC to takeaway their set meals. it is like damn paiseh la. the staffs are like staring me and angie. i dun think the food would be enough to shut hk's mouth up. tmr is finally a rest day for me. maybe a time to brush up on the pday. or no. why should i care. ppls can find all sorts of excuses, ultimately their aim is just no time for projects. and ppls can even take my work for them as granted. shifting responsibilities to one another. maybe this is the most emotional project that i have gone through. but no doubt, its either we survive or we sink together. i can always find through other means to brush up my ACE. i have enough of ranting, chasing, begging, shouting. asking when you all free, chasing after your works, or even doing my assigned tasks during meetings. if you all still have this bit of conscious, DIY. do it yourself. prove it to me that without me you all can survive on ur own. do what u r supposed to do. and do things that u r not assigned to do. be more initiative. |
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